brandon "i deleted the duck" silverman (hellacheez42) wrote,
brandon "i deleted the duck" silverman

  • Music:
reading: middlesex by jeffrey eugenides.

i hope all my readers out there enjoyed my hiatus as much as i did. two weeks without writing; very interesting. i also hope all my readers adjusted to the move as easily as i did. as you will notice, i am under a brand new domain name. will be a collaborative effort between myself and izaak schlossman (who is currently using the domain name as his journal, for now), something of a online zine if you want to call it that. basically, it's gonna be hella cool, and should be up and running in the coming weeks.

yes i'm still reading middlesex. i've fallen way behind in my reading, something i'm not very proud of. it just feels as though i have less and less time to read and more and more obligations to do things like homework or other stupid shit like that. hopefully i can pick up the pace again, because i really like the fact that i'm reading for pleasure again.

i guess the biggest news of these past two weeks is that i am no longer straight edge. it took a lot of thinking, and if you truly want to know all my reasons for it, then ask. basically i'm happy with my decision. my deal is this though: i will be the middle, gray area. i don't want to drink every weekend or even get piss drunk all the time, just tipsy. i don't want to get high every day, just when i feel like it. this decision is totally fun-oriented. if i want to have fun while inebriated, then i'm going to do that. knowing me it won't be that often, because i can have a fuckload of fun without drugs or alcohol (as my previous eighteen and one half years of soberness has shown me), but it'll still happen from time to time. i've already smoked (several times this week - a stat that i'm not proud of, but it's something new i'm trying out, my pace will definitely not be this much from here on out), and plan on drinking sometime soon. we'll see what happens.

today is my last day of spring break. yesterday i went to the beach (the beach! in 80 degree weather! while it's snowing in boston!) with jacy, scott and ian, and had a moment, not necessarily of clarity, but of pure happiness. it happened when i was driving up highway 1, on the way back from san gregorio, watching the sunset out of the corner of my left eye, and listening to the beauty of "one headlight" by the wallflowers. i was just overwhelmed with happiness. i didn't want to be with anyone other than the three i was with, i didn't want to be anywhere else. it was perfect, and it felt great.

in other news, according to, i am worth exactly $2,112,950.00.
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